Pornblography.com, Cly Maxwell, and a box full of....

I have a growing list of people that I would like to buy a drink, someday. Cly Maxwell has just moved himself into the top 10 of that list. Why? I'll tell you why!

It all started with Cly's plea to Carly at Pornblography.com:

First of all, big ups to Carly for letting me rant and rave in her whitespace. Some would not be so brave. If I behave like a good little boy, hopefully she'll continue to let me bedazzle you all with my mastery of English grammar.

For some reason, after years of paying them no mind, I'm suddenly fascinated by those "lifelike" latex vaginas that all the sex toy companies crank out. Perhaps it's the photos of the beautiful adult film stars on the boxes. More likely it's the fact that I know what's it's like to really engage in coitus with a porn star, and I assume the holes on these little devices are tighter.

I'm going into this blind, without ever having sampled these wares, but I think I'd like to become the world's foremost authority on synthetic vagina and ass combination kits. Like that guy Hiroki in Maxim who reviews the microwavable food, I want to sample and savor a stack of latex orifices every month, and share my gained knowledge with the world. Knowing me, I'll lose interest pretty soon, but nonetheless I'm searching for a porno rag that wants a fake pussy reviewer.

Let's start the bidding.

Cly is a persistant man. Carly contacted us and begged for a way to get him off of her back and onto his. We decided to "rise" to the occasion and give him what he wanted. (a whole box of what he wanted, actually)

It's good to know that Cly is a "stand up" guy. He was, not only, extremely grateful for the box of "boxes," but he has already started to review them. Check out his review of the Tiffany Mynx Realistic Pussy & Ass here.

I can't wait to read his next one! You should also check out Cly's site, searchextreme.com. It's informative and entertaining.

Hmmm....
Upon rereading all of this I have decided that I should put Carly ahead of Cly on my "drink" list. Cly is going to be busy for quite a while.

The Snerd
erosboutique.com

The Aneros Stimulator

Women have the iRabbit and Jenna's Beaver. Now, men have the Aneros Stimulator.

Here's a few words from the makers themselves:

"The Aneros MGX Massager is a patented anal sphincter-driven, prostate-perineum massager. With the Aneros, men can achieve strong continuous full body orgasms previously unattainable through conventional sexual techniques.

The medically researched and designed Aneros was developed specifically to massage what is becoming commonly referred to as the Male G-spot - the prostate, or more specifically, the prostate-perineum. Whereas the primary goal of a prostate massager is to massage the male prostate, the Aneros is by far the most effective of any available massager. It is the only medically researched and patented prostate massager, anatomically designed to work perfectly with the male body.

What makes the Aneros truly unique is that it is a hands-free, self-propelled device. The Aneros converts the anal sphincter’s natural motions and contractions directly into stimulation of the prostate and perineum, meaning that the user does not use it have to use it manually. In fact, we recommend that manual prostate massage only be done by an expert or an urologist. Self massage of the prostate can be dangerous if not done correctly. With the Aneros, this is not a risk because your body tells the Aneros how gently or vigorously the prostate will be massaged. The Aneros works on its own whereas other available devices require some type of manual intervention, which either requires the help of a partner or the individual being limited to a number of positions that he can effective massage the prostate while manipulating it with his hands. The Aneros has no such limitations. Sitting, standing, bent over, upside down -- there are endless possibilities to the positions that Aneros can be used in."

We've been selling these like crazy. I think you can already see why.

The Snerd
erosboutique.com

Bella Loves Jenna

That's right! Bella Loves Jenna!
...and we do too!
We have a new store policy, here. If Jenna Jameson is about to release something, order enough of it to fill a warehouse. Everything that girl touches turns to gold, I swear!
It has broken most (if not all) sales records, already. The online trailer promised something amazing and the video certainly delivers it.



It's no surprise, really. We have a hard time keeping any of her videos on the shelf. Come to think about it, one of our best vibrators has her name on it, too! Jenna's Beaver is the "Rolls Royce" of vibrators. Her strap on is another store favorite.




















Hmmm. I think Jenna needs to come out with a car. Think about the "extras" it could have. Get on it, Jenna!!!

By the way, we have some of the coolest customers in the world! A cute couple came in and told us the best little tip for keeping nylon lines straight:
Draw them on! During WWII, women donated all of their nylons to the military for parachute material. To keep themselves looking proper, they drew their lines up the backs of their legs to give the illusion of wearing stockings. I know I'm trying it (as soon as I figure out how to draw a straight line).

If you are in the Boston area and you are reading this on your computer today...
GO OUTSIDE! IT'S BEAUTIFUL OUT THERE!!!!

The Snerd
erosboutique.com